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Post by belhaven on May 2, 2010 0:09:03 GMT -1
What do you call a bloke who gets drinks for a fat girl in a nightclub? A barman.
I'm fed up of people challenging my ethics and saying I don't do enough to better the world. Even my coat is recycled... ...it used to be a leopard
Met a stunning woman at a property convention. She told me she lives in a mansion so rural she can walk around her home naked with the curtains open.... I told her I was currently developing a semi into something much bigger
Gave my girlfriend an orgasm last night. Ungrateful bitch spat it out!!
Sperm doner. The worst kebab I ever had
I've just discovered my dog has a latex allergy. God knows how I'm going to explain that to the vet.
My brother brought his new girlfriend home tonight. The verdict? Flat chested, fat legs, and a flabby arse. Oh, and she doesn't react well to criticism
had to sack an employee last week for coming to work dressed as a playing card. If there's one thing I won't tolerate in my office, it's jokers !
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Post by Daren on May 2, 2010 9:27:45 GMT -1
Met a stunning woman at a property convention. She told me she lives in a mansion so rural she can walk around her home naked with the curtains open.... I told her I was currently developing a semi into something much bigger hahahahahaha, love it ;D
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Post by belhaven on May 4, 2010 17:28:41 GMT -1
went clubbing last night..................... got 3 seals and a penguin
A Woman goes to the doctors and says "Doc I'm really worried, I've been taking steroids and seem to have grown a penis" Doc says "anabolic?" woman says "no just a penis."
once got a discount from a hooker because she didn't have all her own teeth. I received a further discount for just doing the deed behind a skip in an alley. I thought I would post it on here because the people on moneysavingexpert.com were most unappreciative
My girlfriend is a porn star. She is going to be so pissed off when she finds out!
Don't confuse laxatives with viagra......It makes you crap in bed
I've always liked a good book to read while having a shit; which is, conversely, the reason why I'm banned from public library!
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